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Things they don’t teach in school #1

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Things they don't teach in school #1

7 months ago 7 months ago

Things they don’t teach in school #1

by Johnny Alpha 7 months ago7 months ago

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“Try bleeping the locking mechanism again, I can’t hold it much longer!”
I mean, if it’s mooning us, isn’t the entirety of it its ass?
Oh baby, now open your mouthpiece
The strip is the black thing on the back of the card. The card is the money-square.
Bungalow – English single storey dwelling
Ah, so that is what’s happening with me
Dedicated to the truck drivers on the site
The Black Pearl only has three sails
LIFE GOALS
Witty title
As long as you’re not allergic. Then it gives you hives.
The world, I swear…
Especially if you forget you’re cooking dino-shaped nuggets
I have never been so proud to be a meme-thief!
Alas, this labour is in vein
Some employees are quite different
Put the one corner in the other corner. Put the third corner in. Put the fourth corner in. Put the fifth corner in. Wait…
Just give it a little polish to make it look better!
Do you need a hand?
The male is holding the lever
These wrinkles ‘ll iron right out, right?
Why do we even have that lever?!
KRONK!!!
Two lumps, please
Someone’s got to do the paperwork

“Try bleeping the locking mechanism again, I can’t...

“Try bleeping the locking mechanism again, I can’t...
I mean, if it’s mooning us, isn’t the...

I mean, if it’s mooning us, isn’t the...
Oh baby, now open your mouthpiece

Oh baby, now open your mouthpiece
The strip is the black thing on the...

The strip is the black thing on the...
Bungalow – English single storey dwelling

Bungalow – English single storey dwelling
Ah, so that is what’s happening with me

Ah, so that is what’s happening with me
Dedicated to the truck drivers on the site

Dedicated to the truck drivers on the site
The Black Pearl only has three sails

The Black Pearl only has three sails
LIFE GOALS

LIFE GOALS
Witty title

Witty title
As long as you’re not allergic. Then it...

As long as you’re not allergic. Then it...
The world, I swear…

The world, I swear…
Especially if you forget you’re cooking dino-shaped nuggets

Especially if you forget you’re cooking dino-shaped nuggets
I have never been so proud to be...

I have never been so proud to be...
Alas, this labour is in vein

Alas, this labour is in vein
Some employees are quite different

Some employees are quite different
Put the one corner in the other corner....

Put the one corner in the other corner....
Just give it a little polish to make...

Just give it a little polish to make...
Do you need a hand?

Do you need a hand?
The male is holding the lever

The male is holding the lever
These wrinkles ‘ll iron right out, right?

These wrinkles ‘ll iron right out, right?
Why do we even have that lever?!

Why do we even have that lever?!
KRONK!!!

KRONK!!!
Two lumps, please

Two lumps, please
Someone’s got to do the paperwork

Someone’s got to do the paperwork
What could go wrong ….

What could go wrong ….
Either way she gets you hard

Either way she gets you hard
But.. he’s on the other side of the...

But.. he’s on the other side of the...
Ooooo shiney

Ooooo shiney
Well well well

Well well well
Meouch….

Meouch….
Go get some water, you magnificent raisin <3

Go get some water, you magnificent raisin <3
A shame indeed

A shame indeed
That guy enjoyed his job 😂

That guy enjoyed his job 😂
* sigh *

* sigh *
How do you know if a product is...

How do you know if a product is...
I think it’s made out of Oak

I think it’s made out of Oak
Mmmm, minty!

Mmmm, minty!
Uhm, yes

Uhm, yes
I vant to know vhy these pieces of...

I vant to know vhy these pieces of...
Error 14: there was an error in generating...

Error 14: there was an error in generating...
Possibly best watched with empty mouth

Possibly best watched with empty mouth
I bet that hertz

I bet that hertz
Look, at least have some taco bell or...

Look, at least have some taco bell or...
Could be worse, the author could be Greek.

Could be worse, the author could be Greek.
I am not so jullible!

I am not so jullible!
Aww, crap

Aww, crap
Gotta hand it to them, it’s an eye...

Gotta hand it to them, it’s an eye...
A well parked car

A well parked car
Lacking a bit of self knowledge he is

Lacking a bit of self knowledge he is
It’s GOOD for you! Eat it.

It’s GOOD for you! Eat it.
We don’t let Derek near planes anymore

We don’t let Derek near planes anymore
I had two in my fifties – I’m...

I had two in my fifties – I’m...
*Stare*

*Stare*
My SO needs one of these

My SO needs one of these
That’s worth it’s weight in gold

That’s worth it’s weight in gold
✨✨✨

✨✨✨
Recent political choices seem to make a lot...

Recent political choices seem to make a lot...
Self help, intriguing concept, i wonder how that...

Self help, intriguing concept, i wonder how that...
Oh. Yeah…

Oh. Yeah…
Ctrl+X

Ctrl+X
* facepalm *

* facepalm *
What’s that Chinese curse? “May you live in...

What’s that Chinese curse? “May you live in...
I miss the Dirty Daughters … :/

I miss the Dirty Daughters … :/
And it was a Baja blast

And it was a Baja blast
I would want to try them all too

I would want to try them all too
That is in fact the proper manner. I...

That is in fact the proper manner. I...
“Say when.”

“Say when.”
I once lived in apartment 404. No one...

I once lived in apartment 404. No one...
Poor fellow

Poor fellow
It’s not often that getting news of worms...

It’s not often that getting news of worms...
The covers were far, far away

The covers were far, far away
It is quite difficult to improve by trial...

It is quite difficult to improve by trial...
WORST cask wine I have ever drunk!!

WORST cask wine I have ever drunk!!
Good to know

Good to know
I knew it was going to be bad...

I knew it was going to be bad...
🙂

🙂
Now that’s how you pass some time

Now that’s how you pass some time
It’s beautiful

It’s beautiful
Wait, that’s not a cookie! That’s cake!

Wait, that’s not a cookie! That’s cake!
Don’t panic, it was deliberate

Don’t panic, it was deliberate
It wasn’t a lively conversation

It wasn’t a lively conversation
I’m not

I’m not
Seems perfect to me

Seems perfect to me
Fair enough

Fair enough
Worth it

Worth it
Never skip lego day

Never skip lego day
Steep hill

Steep hill
So! Here’s to the Romulans, localised entirely around...

So! Here’s to the Romulans, localised entirely around...
Keeps me awake at night wondering why

Keeps me awake at night wondering why
Looks like they have a Danish office, too

Looks like they have a Danish office, too
No piercings to mount those ‘rings

No piercings to mount those ‘rings
Oh right uh, you can have this rock....

Oh right uh, you can have this rock....
The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy...

The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy...
Everyone on kijiji and stuff, I swear

Everyone on kijiji and stuff, I swear
Apologies to Paul Simon

Apologies to Paul Simon
Hey! Get your s#!tbox out of the fast...

Hey! Get your s#!tbox out of the fast...
I guess he’s pansexual

I guess he’s pansexual
Not amused.

Not amused.
Am I too late?

Am I too late?

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